Not Pictured

1. Anyone who wears spandex past the age of 7 outside of the gym. And some people who wear it at the gym.

2. Everyone who was at the Denver and Phoenix Airports on June 7, 2009.

3. The guy in the Fry's parking lot who was carrying his baby into the store, walking very slowly in the middle of the road even when he noticed that there was a car coming.

This Is Not Coffee!!!

Anyone who uses Farmers Brothers coffee should punched in the face multiple times! Seriously - you may as well just heat up your water and add a little brown food coloring, because that is essentially what this is!

And Things?

Alright, this picture was submitted by a friend. Let's just break this down really quickly, starting from the top of the sign, moving left to right.

1. Pete's Place is in Greek font, so we are assuming that perhaps we will find Greek food inside?
2. Eggs? I am sure the Greeks eat eggs, but I don't think that it is their specialty.
3. WTF is in that martini glass? And why a martini glass? I didn't think martinis were a breakfast drink and eggs are definitely breakfast food. I would have gone with a mimosa or perhaps a Bloody Mary...
4. Oh, wait - burgers? I get it - maybe eggs for breakfast, burgers for lunch?
5. The KICKER: & things??? There should never be such a general statement on a restaurant's tag line, but if it is necessary "and more" is probably the best choice. Things? Do you even know what that conjures up in my mind??

Perhaps there is a reason the parking lot is empty, but the sign says "OPEN."

I almost forgot - in case you are in a hurry - Pete will serve your eggs and martinis through his drive-thru. Wait - how does that work if the handicap parking is in the way?



Nevermind all of this - I have come to the conclusion that Pete is using this place to wash his mafia drug money. That gives "things" a whole new meaning...

The Bride Wore Fatbabies?

Just in case you can't tell what is going on in this picture - this is a woman on her wedding day. In a dress that doesn't cover her shoes. Which are bright blue Fatbabies. There is nothing that I can say to make this better. But the real question is - Can you see through this dress? Did the show become X-rated another 3 inches up?

Anybody Wanna Polka?

Word on the street is that this guy knows how to play over 4000 songs on the accordion. He deserves a punch in the face for wasting so much time learning that.

Also, the couple who hired him to be the entertainment at their wedding should be punched in the face! Really? Four hours of accordion music isn't even enjoyable for Germans. It's no wonder they drink so much!

Another Sticker...And A Grammar Problem

For the record, this sticker says, "Your Behind."

Unless this guy is trying to tell me that the back window of his truck is actually my butt, he needs a punch in the face! It is one thing to have a ridiculous sticker made for your vehicle. It is quite another to use improper grammar when doing it.

Which reminds me of a sticker that is on a lifted truck that drives around my town. It says, "No Its Not My Boyfriends." I'm actually beginning to think that our local sticker maker was trying to save money and he bought the system without punctuation.

A Hooker? Or A High School Senior?

I was unable to get a picture to help you visualize this, but take my word for it, all of the parents of Sacramento high school students who had their proms on May 2, 2009, need to be punched in the face!

These girls were wearing dresses better suited for the streets of Las Vegas. I was appalled!